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Applying to Uni

The most ridiculous things ever put on a uni application

No matter how ridiculous you think your uni application drafts sound, nothing will top these...

Eleanor Foulds
by Eleanor Foulds
Last Updated:
04 Oct 2024

There’s no doubt that writing uni applications can be more than a bit stressful. You need to sell yourself without bragging, sound super knowledgeable without coming across as boring and stand out without sounding silly. Nightmare!

However, while most of us manage to get it right in the end, there are still some poor souls out there who get it wrong. Very, very wrong. You can check out our guide to crafting the perfect personal statement, but for now, let’s just call this a complete guide to what not to do…

Read our guide to writing the perfect personal statement.

"What is physics? I don’t know, that’s why I want to take it at university…" 


Remember what we said about sounding knowledgeable about your subject? Whatever you do, don’t apply for courses where you don’t have even a vague clue what the subject actually is, or at least imply that is the case. Admissions teams won’t like it, trust us.

Instead, talk about an aspect of the subject that you're interested about learning more about. Bonus points if this topic comes up on the courses you're applying to. It shows you're eager to learn, and have specific interests within your subject area.

"Ever since I watched Shaun the Sheep on CBBC, I have been passionate about becoming a farmer"


It’s good to have an idol, but we can’t help but feel it would be better if they weren’t fictional and aimed at children under the age of 5? Ok this is certainly a very creative application, and this student was probably just trying to stand out, but it stood out for all the wrong reasons.

Rather than relating it back to a children's cartoon, try to talk about work experience you had that made you realise you enjoyed the work, or if you don't have work experience you could talk about skills that you have that lend themselves well to the career or subject.

"I think medicine is a very challenging career, but the hard work pays off – literally!"


Here at Whatuni, we generally believe that honesty is the best policy. However, if this is truly your motivation for applying to uni, in this instance we advocate saying nothing at all. Admissions want to hear that you have a passion for the subject and learning more about it, not a passion to be rolling in all the monies when you graduate.

Instead of focusing on money, focus on other benefits the subject offers. Will you be helping others when you graduate? Does it play to your strengths? Is it something you've done a lot of independent research into?

"I’m hoping to pass my driving test so I can drive to – insert university name here – every day!"


OK, so most universities know they won’t be the only institution you’re applying to, but you don’t need to make it obvious. They want to at least believe you only want to attend their uni, rather than knowing the truth, which is there are up to four others out there for you...

Unless you're only applying to one university, it's best not to mention any university names. Instead, look at topics that come up on all of the courses you're applying to and mention those.

"I have a black belt in Karate and enjoy marital arts"


We’re not sure if that was too much information or just a typo, but either way, it was definitely a mistake…

To prevent silly mistakes like this, get a tutor, family member, friend or any trusted adult to read over your personal statement, and make sure you read it several times yourself. One trick for spotting typos is to read your personal statement from bottom to top. Reading it backwards means it won't make much sense, which actually means your brain is less likely to skim over mistakes like this.

"I am well-respected by my classmates. At school, I hold the position of head bog and it is a post I am performing well"


Again, this is one spell check wouldn't pick up, so another perfect example of why proof-reading is so important.

Coming back to your personal statement a couple of days after you drafted it with fresh eyes can help you to spot any little mistakes like this and correct them before you get your application sent off.

"In my personal life I would not like a life partner, I would like to be single as I hate the idea of marriage. I would like to keep in touch with my friend Isheeta"


This person may have taken the “personal” part of personal statement a little too literally. If your statement sounds like something you’d text a friend or an entry to a blog then press the delete key immediately, before the admissions teams deletes your application for you.

Remember you have a limited number of lines and characters to use in your personal statement, and the last thing you want is to use them up with unrelated waffle. Your personal statement should be about you, but it should focus on the subject you want to study and why you want to study it.

"JK Rowling had her midnight cafes, Roald Dahl’s garden shed has produced wheelbarrows of children’s literature and the Bronte sisters roamed the vast expanse of the Yorkshire moors. I personally retreat to a caravan at the bottom of the garden…"


Um….OK? I mean, what does this even mean? We can picture the confused faces of the admissions team now while the throw the application in the bin. It might seem poetic, but it's actually just a bit cringe.

Instead of comparing yourself to well-known people in your field, talk about why you enjoy and respect their work. This makes you come across as well-read rather than just desperate to show off that you know a few famous people in careers related to your subject.

"On an application to study law: “Has the jury reached a verdict yet?"


They have: Guilty of crimes against humour. The verdict? Application denied.

There's a time and place to be funny, but your personal statement unfortunately isn't one of them. Keep it serious.

"I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. I have been known to remodel train stations on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the areas of heat retention. I write award-winning operas, I manage time efficiently" 


We’re sure at least one of these things is true? We’re assuming it’s the remodelling train stations because that seems the most likely. But we’re probably being really naive.

Either way we doubt their time was managed effectively, especially given the fact that they spent time writing that paragraph in their application.

While it's good to be proud of your achievements, in your personal statement you'll need to make sure you limit yourself to bragging about ones that are actually true. As well as true, they'll want to link to your subject in some way, or a transferrable skill that will help you through your studies.

NEXT:


Learn how to actually write your personal statement.

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